Tomorrow would be a month since Scruffy and I met up to see the pups and no matter how much I wish I could see pictures and videos of Luna’s derpy face, I know that I can’t until he’s ready.

I’d like to trust him when he said he’d like to get to a point where we can both talk to one another again without all the emotions when he reached out today.

In the future, if either one of us reaches out to one another, I can only hope that we both respond with a friendly heart.

An end does not have to be the end.

-Najwa Zebian, Sparks of Phoenix

Today was my first OFFICIAL day at my new job. Erin was out sick so it was tough not having someone to talk to all day but I got a lot of work done. I’m just super excited that it’s my Friday off. I cannot wait. I’m not sure what I’ll be doing yet but a massage sounds super nice right about now. Maybe even a bit of shopping to update my wardrobe.

I also heard layoffs are happening at my old job and it makes me SO angry. They gave me an offer before I got the one I’m at now. If they knew layoffs were happening, why did they offer me a full-time position? It’s a little ridiculous and I’m glad I left when I did. I miss the people but the company wasn’t doing well and my boss wasn’t a great one. She’s cool to talk to but work was a different story. I wish everyone the best and that they all make it out alive.

This has literally been me since Scruffy and I broke up. Add on songwriting, singing, guitar playing, and visiting friends and that would be me to a T. It’s been a hard trying to find myself again now that I don’t have the other half attached to me at all times. I don’t have someone to rely on and someone to help me through my days but I’d like to believe I’ve grown a lot and that’s all that matters.

Apurva is getting married in April in New Jersey but flying into Pennsylvania is much cheaper and closer. I’ve been waiting for the right time to book the flights and this morning I did just that along with the hotel. It’ll be my first trip flying solo and I’m glad I get half a day or so to spend with Apurva before all the festivities start. I’m also super happy Liliana agreed to be my date and is willing to drive so many freaking hours to see me and about our road trip back to her now hometown after the wedding so that she can show me around. She joked that she’ll be my stand-in date just in case I find a boy in time. That’s obviously not going to happen and if it did, I still would not miss a chance to spend quality time with her! Time to plan our road trip, Lily! New memories here we come!

I woke up so early to head back to San Antonio. I’m glad that I did because it only took me two and a half hours instead of the usual three or so.

Since I only had about three hours of sleep I took a nap when I got home. I enjoyed some tea and football. It was nice to just relax without anything on my mind. Sissy and BIL came by for dinner and to pick up the pups.

When they left I had a little jam session and even recorded a part of it. Although it’s not on my new year’s resolutions I had a secret one which was to record and post to the public of myself playing guitar and singing. I wanted to step out of my comfort zone so I went all in and posted it to Instagram this evening.

And now I regret it because I feel so naked even though I know people don’t care or probably skipped through it. I have gotten some good feedback and zero negatives but being who I am I cannot help but wonder and it is killing me. I so badly want to take it off but I made a promise to myself and I have to stick with it.

Since my goal was to post one for the year ended I have held on to my part. At least now I don’t have it looming over my head and I never have to do it again. Staying positive.

Work tomorrow! I will be getting my picture taken and setting my profile up. Cannot wait to have my own machine! Eeek!

I finally got to see the sunrise. It’s the first time in a long time. Traffic had already built but I’m hoping going in earlier will help. Even with the traffic going home wasn’t bad. Thank goodness.

I said hi to some of my old coworkers and holding off on others until my account sets up. My official start date is the 21st so I’m just cruising in early to get a hold of everything.

I was able to grab lunch with Angie and Erin and catch up which was nice. It’s back to lunches at my desk though so we shall see how that goes.

I am pooped and I know I’ll be tired tomorrow night but I have high hopes it’s going to be fun and worth it. Tomorrow night is me and Kieran’s joint farewell happy hour. It’s going to be the last time I see everyone from my previous job. I have low expectations since I was only there for eight months but I do hope I made some lasting friendships.

My last day of work face. Noah says I look cross-eyed. Darn lazy eye.

Work went by super fast. I spent it updating work instructions, making sure the auto download works on the server, have meetings and one with the vendors, and the such. It was definitely one of the busiest days I’ve ever had there.

It was lunchtime before I knew it and Noah walked with me to Doozo. I wanted Treebeards but they were busy and I was lazy to wait.

We brought our food back to the kitchen and I received a message. Soon Noah and I were in a room with Kieran and Salim eating lunch and playing the switch!

Even that went by so fast that soon enough I was walking out the door. Sad to leave because the people there are amazing but happy because a new chapter is to begin.

I went and got my nails done because I obviously need to make a good first impression at my new job tomorrow. I am so tired and cannot wait to go to bed. And the way shorter commute is going to be so sweet.