This Time, I Know

April 3, 2026 by Mellie Dee Leave a Comment

Flashback.

2018.

Feelings of being lost.
Feelings of not being enough.
Feelings of being … stuck.

Like I was moving through life, but not really in it.
Like everything around me kept going, and I couldn’t catch up.

I thought I had to let everything and everyone go.

So I pulled away.
I got quiet.
I kept everything to myself.

It took me so long to realize that doing so only made everything worse.

I felt like I couldn’t talk to my then boyfriend.
I felt like I couldn’t talk to my family.
I felt like I couldn’t talk to my friends.
I felt so alone, even when I wasn’t.

I had thoughts of suicide. Of death. Of not wanting to be alive…
I thought those thoughts were normal my whole life.

And at the time, I didn’t even understand why.

I didn’t know what was going on.
I didn’t know it was depression.

I thought it was just me.
I thought I was the problem.

If I had known then what I know now, I would have made different choices. I would have let in everyone who was willing to listen, and life might have been completely different.

But now that I know what to look for, I can see the signs.

The withdrawal.
The silence.
The heaviness that slowly creeps back in.

I’m back in that place.

But this time I know.

I know what this is.
I know what it tries to take from me.
And I know I don’t have to go through it alone.

So this time, I won’t disappear.
This time, I’ll speak.
Even if it’s hard. Even if it’s messy.

Because I’ve learned that letting people in doesn’t break you.

Staying silent does.

Interviews, Birthdays, & Cookoffs

March 10, 2026 by Mellie Dee Leave a Comment

Life Lately | Interviews, Birthdays, & Cookoffs

I find it hilarious that cats and toddlers are so similar. They just need an iPad with moving objects.

02.26 Still mentoring and made a pit stop at Starbucks for the first time in a long time. When did they change the cups?! It looks like a college coffee shop now.

02.27 Rarely do the kids, my pets, gather together like this. We joke that Hubble is holding a session and they’re all complaining that they aren’t getting fed on time.

I went to Coco Crepes for the first time in a long while to blog and work on a few things. I had an online meeting with Jenn about our company and then headed to the car for some quiet to take a pre-interview call. Let’s call this Company P.

Later that day I went back to the house and found my last red envelope from Gma and wanted to take a pic for remembrance.

Jenn and my rooftop plans with friends got cancelled, but we decided to still meet up. We had to wait almost two hours for a table at Crawfish Cafe, so we walked around At Home and got a lot of ideas for our company. We made a pit stop at Sushi Haya for shots, where Jenn ended up bumping into her cousin and cousin-in-law before we got our table.

We ordered our first seafood boil together and ended up eating until after the restaurant closed. Whoops. We were too into the food and our conversation.

02.28 Franco and I met up with Sissy and BIL for TUTS’ Million Dollar Quartet. We weren’t exactly sure what we’d be seeing, but it’s mostly a concert featuring four famous musicians. It recreates a historic jam session between Elvis Presley, Johnny Cash, Jerry Lee Lewis, and Carl Perkins at Sun Studio in Memphis, Tennessee on December 4, 1956.

Finding out that “Blue Suede Shoes” was actually Carl Perkins’ song, not Elvis’s, was wild.

Later that night Franco and I met up with Jenn for our first Rodeo Cookoff! I won’t be attending the rodeo this year, so this felt like a good substitute. We met up with some old company coworkers, and Jenn was able to get us into two tents, one of which belonged to the Brisket Champion for the year. Would I ever go again? Probably. Who could say no to free food and drinks?

Now if the cookoff did crawfish boils, then there will be no doubt about it.

03.03 We had rescheduled a meeting with Jenn and my friends, but due to travel plans we had to cancel again. So what do Jenn and I do? We decide to go back to Crawfish Cafe—this time with JC and Franco. Jenn and I talked business for a bit, then we ate and spent the rest of the night chatting about random stuff.

03.04 Happy Birthday, Franco! It was a chill day. We stopped at Andretti so he could run a few laps while I played in the arcade.

Later that night we went to Perry’s Steakhouse for his birthday dinner. Their bar bites are definitely more budget-friendly and perfect since I wasn’t really that hungry.

We went back home afterward and watched a couple of episodes of Fallout.

JC’s birthday happens to be a few days after Franco’s, so Jenn and I decided to celebrate both of them together—surprise party style. Jenn and I each had a friend of theirs show up to celebrate with us.

We ordered a lot of food from the menu and played a bunch of darts. Franco got first place, Jenn second, and I came in third.

03.06 Emmy turns 9! I road-tripped with Sissy and BIL to celebrate Emmy’s birthday. As if I haven’t had enough crawfish, Sissy really wanted some and so we got some for lunch. We then went shopping for a bit and relaxed with the kids at home where we had a nice dinner with both sides of the family to celebrate Emmy.

03.07 Emmy is a published author! Her book can be found on Amazon.

She had a book signing at Half Price Books and will have another one at Barnes & Noble in a few weeks. I’m so proud of her for hosting Storytime Saturdays before her book signings. She was nervous but got through it and even made some good sales. I can’t wait for her next book.

Everly could not stay seated. As you can see, she was making faces at the crowd during the reading.

03.08 We went back home, and later that night I recorded my interview and written responses. We’ll call this Company E. It’s so weird answering questions without a person there, but also nice to be able to re-record. If it works out, I’ll be having a second interview, this time virtually with an actual person.

03.09 I had my second interview with Company P! I think it went well. They’re still finishing two other interviews before deciding. If they decide to move forward with me, I’ll be having a third interview with the company.

03.10 We had our board meeting in person over lunch today at Bloom & Bee. The food was delicious, and we spent most of the meeting working through committee updates and everything currently on our plates … both literally and figuratively.

Overall, it’s been a pretty full couple of weeks. Between interviews, birthdays, cookoffs, and book signings, we’ve definitely been busy.

Wish me luck with the interviews and that at least one sticks!

Let’s see what the rest of March brings.

House Filled with Joy

February 23, 2026 by Mellie Dee Leave a Comment

After being away from this space for so long, I don’t even know where to find like-minded bloggers anymore. The ones I once followed have, like me, quietly drifted off the face of the web. So where do we go now to find our people again — to share life the way we used to?

I miss reading about someone’s life in detail. The slow updates. The in-between thoughts. Not just a 10-second window on social media that disappears before it even settles.

Anyway, a short recap.

We kept it low-key this year. We both worked on our own hobby projects, having conversations with one another from our respective offices, which honestly is one of my favorite ways to spend time together.

We exchanged gifts. He got me one of those surprise books wrapped up with only a short description on the outside plus a small rosebush plant. I love a good mystery read, so that felt very on brand. The balloons came from a Galentine’s Day event I hosted but was fitting.

I got him a smoked whiskey set so he can make his own smoky dranks at home.

For dinner, he made flattened chicken breasts with mushroom sauce, homemade mashed potatoes, and roasted broccoli.

So. Dang. Good.

Simple. Cozy. Exactly what I needed.

I know people say Lunar New Year and that’s totally fine. Back home we just say New Year, but here we’ve always said Chinese New Year. No offense anywhere tbh. Say what you want!

Everyone came over to my house for a quick family meal. Sissy and BIL arrived a little early so we could squeeze in a round of Organ Attack and another game that I absolutely cannot remember the name of right now.

It was so good seeing Everly. She’s in her “move a lot” stage and is SO much fun. She copies everything you say. Every. Thing.

There’s something about loud family dinners that feels grounding.

I was able to take home some Chinese styled flowers for the house and as you can see in the last picture, the cats decided gnawing on the strings and setting the balloons free was a fun activity.

I want a guy that looks at me like Ethan looks at Emmy in that first picture.

Brudda and SIL came down with Emmy and Ethan mostly to pick up Everly and my parents, but also to have dinner with some uncles and aunts.

There were technically no plans for the kids to come over to my place but with Emmy and Ethan’s pouting faces and constant complaints to their parents, I somehow ended up with them not one night, but both nights.

The driving back and forth was a little wild, but it was worth it for even the smallest memories.

We made Shrinky Dinks. Played games like Gassy Gus, Pizza, and French Fries, which made me realize, as I’m typing this, a concerning amount of my kid games are food-related. Took them to eat Chick-fil-A.

After dropping Ethan off for his eye appointment with his parents, I took Emmy to Five Below where she picked out a few things for herself and Ethan. Then we stopped by the new Barnes & Noble, where she found Artemis but in stuffed animal form.

Emmy and I also took Everly for a walk. That’s basically what Everly knows me as now. The lady that walks her.

After dinner with everyone, I took Emmy and Ethan home and surprised them with cute bath bombs. Later that night, Emmy tried learning punch needling. She couldn’t quite get it, and honestly I feel her. Punch needling isn’t as cool as I thought it would be. Or maybe I just haven’t learned it well enough yet.

And just like that, the kids left. Back to the quiet abyss of working on my hobbies and continually job searching.

**20260223 | Big Brother Big Sister Lunch**

My mentee from Big Brothers Big Sisters can never make the monthly after-school meetups, so I try to visit her during one of her lunch hours instead. It’s almost an hour away, so it takes some planning. This time, I brought her Raising Cane’s. We talked about scholarships, college life, and Roth IRAs. Gotta start them out right.

Maybe this is what blogging looks like now. Less polished. More patchwork. Just little windows into ordinary days.

Lost, Found, and Slightly More Tired

February 17, 2026 by Mellie Dee 2 Comments

Is anyone still reading this? It’s been 3 years, 4 months, and 18 days since I last posted…

I never meant to disappear for this long, but a lot of life has happened. Since then:

I’ve continued mentoring high school students through two different programs, which keeps me grounded. I even crocheted each of them their own blanket to take to college when they graduate. When they call me Mama Mel, my heart melts. I hate the nickname Mel but with them, it’s different. I want kids someday, but if that never happens, this has still given me a sense of purpose and love.
I bought a house which I’ll soon fully own. The goal is to live here for a few years, sell, and move on. With the area booming, there’s a good chance it could be a smart investment but if life keeps me here longer, I’m okay with that too.
Loss has been heavy. My Popo and my Uncle in Hong Kong passed away. Last year, my Grandma in Texas also passed, as well as Franco’s Mee-maw. This month, Pluto, Brudda and Tammy’s beloved dog of many years was put down due to old age. It’s made me think about Rizzo (my dog), Bruno and Kato (Sissy and BIL’s dogs), and even Luna (my ex’s dog, who I’ll never really know if she’s passes).
My Aunt June here in Texas and my Aunt Kathy in Hong Kong both beat breast cancer, which feels like such a huge blessing in the middle of everything else.
With loss also came new life: my niece, Everly, was born.
I was laid off from my job and have been searching for a new one for almost a year. Living off my savings without going into debt has been bittersweet, at times enjoyable, at times frustrating, but it’s given me space to learn new skills and explore hobbies. I’ve learned to appreciate this time off in a way I didn’t the last time I was unemployed. A whole year is crazy, but I’m making the most of it.
We adopted a cat, Hubble (formerly Pumba), who used to belong to Lily and Daniel right before their twin boys were born. Having two cats and a dog under one roof has been wild, but I’ve heard that the purring can actually help heal you so, Hubble, do your thing!
Over the last six months of 2025, I attended an emotional intelligence and leadership training and was named Torchbearer, the highest honor. It recognizes strong leadership and care for others, and it’s rare for an out-of-towner like me to receive it, since I completed most of the program from Texas while the classes were in California.
There was a breakup, and we got back together. We’re actively working on our relationship. We’ve traveled a bit together in the entirety of our relationship: Arizona, a cruise, California, Florida (twice — hello, Universal!), and various cities across Texas. He also planned a surprise trip for us in April, and I have no idea where we’re going, so we’ll see what happens!
I went to Canada for Evelyn’s wedding, which was my first time driving out of the United States. It wasn’t as intimidating as I expected, though it did feel a little strange at first. We grew apart as we got older, but after the wedding, I feel closer to my cousin and realized how much we share in our “granny hobbies.” Oh, how I wish she lived closer so we could have arts-and-crafts nights.
We’ve won Mentorship Committee of the Year two years in a row through my professional organization, where I serve as Director of that committee. It’s been a joy putting together events that sell out. How can I market my event planning skills more?
I’m in the early stages of starting a business. The LLC and EIN are official! It’s been exciting to build from the ground up. What kind of business? Stay tuned! I might share hints here, or you may have to reach out to find out once it’s more official.

I’m sure there’s more I could share, but if this is what I remember most, then I guess it’s what mattered most.

If you’re still reading, wow — thank you for sticking with me. I’ve missed having a place to put all of this down. I’ve missed writing about my days, my thoughts, and whatever pops into my head.

For a long time, this blog was tied to an old chapter of my life, which made it hard to come back to. I’m still figuring out what returning to this space looks like and whether I’ll stay. Time has moved forward for everyone, and I’m genuinely glad to see how their lives have been unfolding. Our paths may cross again someday, or they may not. Either way, I trust that life will unfold exactly as it should.

2022 September | Mum’s Retirement, Game Night, Last Chemo, Spaying Artemis, Stargazing & A Whole Lot of Ethan

September 30, 2022 by Mellie Dee Leave a Comment

20220901 | Houston Restaurant Week | Mum | Astor Farm to Table | Katy, Texas

September 1, 2022

Due to such a busy month, I wasn’t able to take Mum on our usual mother daughter Houston Restaurant Week until this day. It was also to celebrate that she had retired! I chose Astor Farm to Table and it EXCEEDED my expectations. We use to love Peri Peri until it closed down near us and since then I’ve been trying to find a South African delight near us since. This is the winner.

From their bone marrow to their oxtail to their dessert. I don’t know what they put in it but I wanted it all again. Mum even asked for the hazelnut cake for her birthday because she loved it so much. She also loved the drink so much she was spewing random things which we had a great laugh about. I made a montage of some of those random things with video/pictures for our family to watch.

20220902 | Houston Restaurant Week | Alice Blue | Houston, Texas | Paola & Mellie Dee

September 2, 2022

I finally got to see Paola! We went to Alice Blue for Houston Restaurant Week lunch. The food was great. I loved how simple the mushroom dish was yet flavourful and filling.

It was nice to catch up with her and listen to her stories and I treasure the advice she gives me when I tell her my woes. She showed me around the area, letting me know which shops are some of her favourites which worked out as I needed a gift for Luke’s birthday.

20220902 | Mum's Retirement Party | Acadian Coast | Houston, Texas | Frankenstein & Mellie Dee

Later that night was retirement dinner at Acadian Coast for Mum. Frankenstein trekked his way over as well. Funny enough, the parents were going to go on a plane to Disneyworld to meet up with Brudda, SIL, Emmy and Ethan for a week of fun so they didn’t want to eat anything too crazy that could give them a stomachache. I on the other hand welcomed everything, especially the raw oysters. YUM!

There were many times Mum would tell me to stop grabbing things off his plate because he needs to eat. I translated that to him and he remarked that he didn’t mind. Also, hello, Mum, he’s welcome to grab off my plate as well!

20220903 | Luke's Birthday | Mellie Dee & Michelle

September 3, 2022

Luke’s birthday party finally arrived which also meant finally getting to see Michelle!! I loved watching how the kids interact with him. They were super caring and kept trying to feed Luke cake as he tried to flip it over.

20220903 | Game Night at Sissy & BIL | El Tiempo | Frankenstein & Mellie Dee

Later in the day I went over to Sissy & BIL’s for game night with Frankenstein. We played my favourite, Bananagrams, and though the name always escapes me, one my favourite games that BIL has. along with Tetris at the end. Frankenstein isn’t a fan of board games but he stayed through it all. I could see him getting tired toward the end. We did stop in between for El Tiempo but that probably just made him more sleepy.

20220904 | Stone Age | Belated 1:1 Birthday Dinner with June

September 4, 2022

I take June, every year, somewhere new for her birthday and although late, we landed on Stone Age. We had fun cooking on a hot rock and laughed a lot on our fails. This meal serves two but we felt it was too much food. I do like the place though and hoping we can come back again in the future.

September 5, 2022

I hung out with Mallory and she was nice enough to take me and the kids to Twistee’s for ice cream. I had been craving a dipped cone since forever. If you’re reading this, Mallory, when will you take us again?

September 7, 2022

Last day of chemo. It gets harder at the end as your body gets weaker. In the beginning she would be able to have conversations but it quickly changed to her sleeping through most of it.

September 8, 2022

Artemis finally got spayed. These are the pictures Frankenstein sent me. She was so chill in the crate even though it was her first time out of the house since her capture. haha And after with her wearing her fancy neck pillow.

20220911 | Sissy Day | Manicure, Coffee, Macarons

September 11, 2022

Here is a small glimpse of my embroidery project. I had to finish it by October for someone’s wedding so I took it to places where I was able to work on it, i.e., the nail salon. Sissy didn’t want me to but I had to get it done! The ladies that worked there all loved it and came over to look. After our pedicures we went to Sweet intensity next door for some treats, macarons and iced coffees, since we didn’t do lunch.

September 12 & 13, 2022

We had a two day workshop since many folks from out of town came in for the conferences and kickoff of a new thing. I was surprised with all the fidget toys the provided. Bet your ass they came home with me to fidget with while I was in meetings.

20220914 | Team Away Day | Escape Game | Masraff's | Houston, Texas

September 14, 2022

Our team did a half day away where we worked in the morning and went to The Escape Game’s Gold Rush experience. We escaped!! Then it was dinner at Masraff’s. This has quickly become one of my top restaurants work has taken us.

September 19, 2022

We had WEN mentoring session at La Madeline’s. It’s a different set up than my usual mentorship meetings but felt like this could be a good group. More than half did not show up though so I’m not sure.

20220924 | Mellie Dee & Ethan | Katherine & Karen's School Sale

September 24, 2022

Rose’s daughter’s, Karen and Katherine, had a school event where they have their own businesses and people go around and actually shop. I took Ethan and he had fun eating and drinking everything. I bought him some things and he picked some things out for Emmy as well.

20220924 | Stargazing with Frankenstein | Mellie Dee

Later that night Frankenstein picked me up. We stopped by Buccee’s, picking up dinner and headed to a remote location for star gazing. He set up his telescope and then we had dinner by car brake light. hehe You can’t tell what we were eating but there was a sausage, sandwiches and chips. We didn’t get to do much star gazing as the clouds decided not to cooperate. After a while, we packed up and went home.

20220930 | Elyson Cafe | Playdate | Mellie Dee, Ethan, Mallory, Jacob, Beth, Caden

September 30, 2022

Last playdate with JJ & Connor before he left back to Dallas and it had been a while since I’ve seen Mallory & Beth. There was another Mum with her kid there as well. This was also the first time I met Caden! He was itty bitty and kept mean mugging me whenever he woke up from his beauty sleep. We had lunch afterward before we all went our separate ways.

Adventures with Ethan are always a whirlwind of fun. He loves to learn and help. Two top favourite memories from these pictures:

He was afraid of the giant skeleton and warewolf on our walk. He didn’t want to walk on that side of the street but I made him. After staring at it and watching me take pictures of Rizzo with them, he turned around and said “Goojei, no scare, picture.” It was the cutest and we snapped a lot of pictures and he asked to go back a few times afterwards.
He wanted to help me cook so he dragged his little stand chair over, helped me wash and clean the mushrooms and dropped them into the pan. He was so excited afterward and anyone that came to the kitchen after, he would tell them that he helped me cook it and they should eat it.