If you’re a follower of Alex’s blog, this might sound familiar. I had this written to post on the special day but she beat me to the punch! We are so alike!

It’s a long post so it’s okay if you skip it and only read the memes but if you read it all, I’ll send you a virtual cookie.

Today’s the first day of classes for my Alma Mater. It’s kind of bizarre not going back to school after being in it for forever. Everyone’s reunited and it’s so strange that I am not. Some people love work more but I miss those last couple years of college. That’s when I found people I actually felt comfortable being myself around. Maybe this will change after a few more months but for now, that’s how it feels to me.

I’ve been told I get along with everyone. Walking down the halls or through campus, I would see someone I know or they would see me and we would exchanges “hellos” to the point where I was dubbed “popular”.

They cannot be more wrong.

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If y’all don’t know by now, I immigrated from Hong Kong so in pre-school, I didn’t understand English. But was able to still make friends. I guess when you’re a kid all you had to do was share crayons.

When elementary came, still not fully understanding English, kids jumped at the chance to be my friend. Maybe because they’ve never seen a little Chinese girl before? I don’t know.

It’s weird how it happened as well. All the cool kids were in another classroom yet I got along with them during lunch, recess, and arts. Guess sharing your jump rope with the girls and playing basketball with the boys helped, too.

I still felt like an outsider though since the lack of English puts you in a barrier.

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After 4th grade, my parents told me I get to finish 5th before moving to somewhere else in Houston. But shit happens and I didn’t get to do my 5th grade with my friends I grew up with. I didn’t get to say goodbye. I lost them all.

It was hard making new friends at a new place going into 5th grade when everyone already had their own friends. I got really shy but met Manvi on the bus and we became instant best friends. We even had best friend gems. We’re not best friends anymore but for some reason, we both still have our gems and talk about it whenever we bump into one another. I met some of her friends and made some of my own.

After elementary ended, my cousin, Timothy who was in the same grade as me, told me I hung out with the popular kids and was surprised. Really? … Uh … Okay.

Middle school happened. More than half the people from 5th grade went to a different middle school so I had to yet again make new friends. I got even more shy. I didn’t talk a lot in and out of class except for orchestra since Timothy and my brother were in that class with me but I got along with everyone and would know anyone that walked down the hall. I had classes with some football players, basketball players, cheerleaders, etc. and we got along well. But I was still reserved.

I was told I was friends with the populars. So why didn’t I feel that way? I still felt like the awkward kid.

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High school came and less than 1/4th of my middle school went to my high school. Everyone else went to the high school that was 3 minutes away from my house. Sometimes school districts suck at zoning. My commute was 10 minutes to school … and that’s without traffic.

Shy yet again I kept to myself most of the time but as the days went on, I started making new friends naturally. Being in basketball and orchestra helped a lot. Sophomore year I broke through my shell and got all crazy and met a lot of people . Everyone seemed to know me. Yet I still didn’t feel like I fit in. But people who walked with me felt I was because I knew anyone I passed by in the halls.

When I finally thought I found some great friends who I never want to leave, college came. We all went to different colleges and it got kind of hard to keep in touch. Even with Facebook, things were different. If someone doesn’t want to make the effort, it doesn’t work. I’m still friends with some of them and they are now my bestest. I would not change that for the world.

It took a while but I started to make friends in college. Went through many of them if you ask me. College is a place you grow and find yourself … some people never grew up and I didn’t want to stay through the immaturity.

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Throughout all those years, I never felt I fit in no matter how much I tried with whatever group I was in. I was told I was “popular” but I felt like the kid from the outside looking in. I was never in the “in” crowd. I was never popular. I just knew a lot of people. That is all.

I never felt like I fit in until the end of college. I found people in my life I could finally be myself (other than the ones I could obviously before) because they believed in the same things as me and didn’t care how weird I was, I hope.

Now I’m at my new job trying hard to stay in touch with them. But it’s hard when they don’t reciprocate. It’s even harder to make friends now because all you do is work. Hopefully some workers become my real life friends but that’s unlikely.

I’m thankful for the friends that text me or message me or email me through the weeks … it makes work more bearable and shows that they care. I’m actually grateful that I’m reconnecting with some of my good friends from high school. It feels great. I’m not sure where it’s going but I hope they’re here to stay.

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I’m glad I got over the phase of trying to fit in because no matter where I’m at, I know I have the bestest.

Price texted me the other day that he’s too busy working and getting his MBA to make friends and stay in touch with them. My response? I’ve been through that. All through high school and college. So I learned.

To me, if they really truly are your friends, no matter how long you’ve been distant, they’ll always be there because they know you’re working towards your future that defines the rest of your life. Real friends will always be your friend. No matter how long. It’s that simple.

With Price it’s been 6 years give or take and we can still hold a conversation when I saw him again at Alyssa’s wedding.

Same goes with blogger friends. I’m always here for y’all! Even if we never met.

That’s the end of my reflection. Hope you all have a great hump day! And for those starting school today or have school, hope it went well. Enjoy it while you can!

P.S. If you were wondering, Manvi went to all the same schools as me … even college. Bizarre, right? We’re not close anymore but it’s always nice when we see each other.

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It feels like someone punched my stomach and chopped my arms and legs off and ran away knowing I can’t chase them. Aftereffects of working out after not working out for so long. POP Pilates. And then I was dumb enough to do it again. Planks are already hard to do and it’s even harder the second time around when some of your limbs are gone … and it’s only for less than 12 minutes. I do have to say, I love it. The burn especially. It hurts so good.

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I’ve been thinking about certain people in my life. Along with those I don’t talk to anymore. It’s kind of depressing. Trying to keep up with people while we both have busy schedules has always been tough but it’s even tougher now that I’m not even near. I hope I don’t lose them. I would text them everyday if I knew I wasn’t bothering them. Some of them are nice enough to do so and I’m thankful. Life would be lonely without that. I’m hoping to visit them in September. Fingers crossed.

If you’ve never read “Tuesdays with Morrie” by Mitch Albom, you’re missing out. Given, I’m not done reading it yet but it’s taught me a lot and given me a different perspective with some things. I saw this book on the shelf of one of my FTK Advisors’ bookshelf and I recall telling her it was on my to-read list. She simply just gave it to me and I’m happy she did. Simple gestures … those are always the best.

One thing Morrie says that I cannot agree enough:

“… Giving to other people is what makes me feel alive …
When I give my time,
when I can make someone smile after they were feeling sad,
it’s as close to healthy as I can ever feel.”
– Morrie

I feel the same and I love when I can do so and I hope that never changes. If you ever need a friend, a simple e-mail is all it takes.

This post was written at an earlier time because I had food poisoning all day yesterday. So naturally, I had lots of time. Yeah it was a lot of joy. My last week before my big girl job starts and I’m thrown with this. Wonderful!

Hopefully I’m all better because I’ll be signing my contract later today! I’m a bit excited and a bit scared. I am not ready to be at a big girl’s job. I wonder if I can still wear my jeans. I love my jeans. Where do people buy their big girl’s clothes? I can never find anything appropriate.

And I get to see Alyssa afterwards! I’m going to her house to help her with some wedding stuff before the special day this weekend! I’m excited. I haven’t seen her in a year. Yep. It’s so hard getting together because we’re so busy but I’m happy that I get to see her before she’s a Mrs.

Oh, and my new planner came in last week. You obviously cannot tell by my facial expression but I’m beyond stoked. It’s a weekly planner where one side is the week and the other side is for notes and such. Finally, one that I’ve always dreamed of.

So I saw this on Alex’s blog and I thought it would be pretty fun.

A. Run/workout in the heat and humidity or freezing temps and snow? I like running in the cold. Always have and always will. I like the way it feels sweating in the cold. It feels nice. And your body works harder to keep warm. Win – Win.

B. Have washboard abs or flat abs? Flat abs. Washboard abs always freaked me out. Even on guys. It seems so surreal. And I like the natural look. It’s no wonder my close friends think I like scrawny guys …

C. Dr. Oz or The Doctors? I watch neither. Not gonna lie … I wouldn’t of even known they were shows if it wasn’t for Alex’s answer. haha

D. Jillian Michaels or Bob Harper? Like I’ve stated in the past, I’m not a big fan of Jillian even though her ways do work … so I guess I pick the latter. Bob Harper it is. And he’s kind of cute for his age (46) … scruff does something for me.

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E. Frozen Yogurt or Ice Cream? Neither. But if I had to pick, frozen yogurt of course.

F. To train: Upper body or Lower body? Lower body is so much more easier for me. Sadly, I’ve been getting injured in both ankles. But I really need to focus more on my upper body. Note to self: find upper body workouts!

G. Protein powder or food with protein? Food with protein. I’ve never drank protein powder and though I think it’s the easy way, I like to eat my food more than drink it because you get a more sense of fulfillment in your tummy. I might try it in the future, but not anytime soon.

H. Lunges or squats? Squats are easier for me and my knees. And I feel like they work better than lunges but nonetheless I try to incorporate some lunges in there.

I. Sweet or salty? I guess I’d have to go with salty since I’m not a big fan of sweets.

J. Workout attire: cute or comfy? Comfy of course. I do not put on skimpy workout outfits and makeup to workout in hopes that someone will notice me. I will never understand those girls. Plus I workout at home and run around the neighborhood so … I’m pretty sure it’s little kids and old men. I wish I looked this good while working out. Hair in place. Makeup perfect. Pshh … fake.

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K. Body Pump or Heavy lifting? Heavy lifting though I would love to try body pump one day. I’ve heard wonderful things about it.

L. Yoga or Pilates? I learned Pilates in 7th grade because my coach just had a kid and wanted to loose weight. It’s very helpful and I loved it … I should start again. It wasn’t stressful on my joints as other workouts I do. Yoga, I would love to try. I heard it’s good for your back and whatnot. Definitely something I should try. My back is all kinds of messed up!

M. Nike or Adidas? Nike. Adidas always hurt my running feet.

N. Running on the treadmill or outdoors? I love running outdoors. I love smelling the wonderful air and seeing people and cars passing by. The only time I run on the treadmill is if it’s raining hard outside. If it’s drizzling, I’ll still go out. Oh, and if it’s super hot outside.

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O. Whole Foods or Trader Joe’s? I have yet to been to Trader Joe’s. It’s on my to-do list. I’m waiting until they finish building them here in Texas. So I guess Whole Foods will have to do till then when I’m able to compare.

P. Summer or Winter Olympics? I love them both. But if I have to pick one, summer since I can play most of the sports. I would love to know how to do gymnastics. So jealous!

Q. Exercise classes or Exercise videos? I would love, love, loveeeee to do an exercise class but because of my insecurity I’ve always been hesitant so I do exercise videos which does not hold my attention most of the times. At least when I’m in the comfort of my own home, I can look like shit and a total goofball.

R. Steamed veggies or roasted veggies? I love them both. And even if I have to pick one, I would still pick both. I love veggies and no matter how you cook them (as long as it’s not fattening) I would love it!

Happy Tuesday, y’all!

I set out to Houston bright and early and throughout the whole 3 hour car ride all by my lonely self, I cried.

I started thinking about Eric’s Mum … leading me to think of Uncle N. and how he’ll never see me do all the things I’ve grown up to do. I always tell myself it’s a privilege to be alive. To have so many people in and out of my life. People who love tolerate me and my issues.

I cried because I was sad that there are so many people who I wish was still in my life but I also cried because I was happy that there are so many people who are still here for me and I know will never leave.

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Onto happier news. I played around with Rocky, showered, then headed out for a 7 hour car shopping experience. Car Shopping = Boring! We ended up buying a brand new SUV which was actually my 3rd choice. It’s not a well known brand but it gets me from place to place.

I’m slowly falling in love with it. I got to drive it to Sugar Land to see family since it’s a new year. I cannot wait to have it all to myself. Till then, it’ll stay at home so that it gets a good mileage and an oil change before I do long drives.

I got to eat dinner with the parentals, June, Sissy, and Uncle G. It was fun and I am happy I made my way down here even though this Houston trip only equals to less than 24 hours.

Love Life.