Jealous

Finally. Someone else who sees this song other than just losing someone from a breakup. For him, his best friend that passed away. For me, walking away from a friendship that meant a great deal to me because of his girlfriend not liking our friendship. This is what music is to me. Everyone finding different meanings to the same songs. To communicate through music when all else fails. When the meaning of a song can change as you go through certain things and see it in a new light.

After getting home this morning from hoodrat shiet, I was too wired to sleep. Instead, I got my dance piece down for a Ron Pope song that no one will ever see, worked out, and worked on my projects until 7 am. An hour and a half of sleep later, Rizzo pounced on me like clockwork and I haven’t been able to fall back to sleep since. I haven’t found a solution to what’s been bothering me but I feel a little better after the excessive sweating.

I miss having someone to share everything with without fear of judgement but I’m sure he’s fully gone now. He broke me when he tore down my “emotions” wall and left. I know I can’t change what’s coming mid-September but I need to figure out an escape route and hope, come mid-October, it’ll go away. Once this passes, there will be less emotional posts. I know every thing will be fine so for now, off to run errands and work on my projects. Have a wonderful Labour Day Weekend!