Distractions

[2018] 302/365: Distractions

Scruffy and I had called it quits this past Friday. One day short of our two years and seven months. He was who I wanted to spend forever with but along the way fears and anxieties grew to the point where I needed to find and fix myself before I could be with him completely and it just wasn’t fair for him to wait for me. He has been my rock and confident for so long that I forget how to be. I’m thankful to have so many loving friends and family surround me as I find myself again and can only hope he’s getting the same treatment.

I’m thankful for co-workers, though they don’t know what is exactly going on, to invite me out to lunch. It was even paid for! And for cupcakes just showing up randomly at the office. It was all necessary distractions that I took in.

It wasn’t a day to diet but I haven’t eaten these past few days that eating bad was so good. I’m the opposite of many people. I don’t eat when I’m sad and the last time this happened was before Scruffy and I started dating. Funny enough he had hurt me then and I lost almost thirty pounds. Maybe I can see a positive in all of this, that I’ll be somewhat skinnier. But maybe me saying that out loud kind of jinxed it.